Conflicting Images Of Femininity

What wonderful weather this morning, three degrees below zero and sunny. It would have been a cracking cycle in. Would you believe that some people are bemoaning the cold and longing for the return of summer. Did I miss something here, they're longing for the return of that wet, miserable period a few months back? Give me winter any day, preferably with six-foot high snowdrifts but now I'm just dreaming.

I take the bus, no squash tonight but I'm still resting my legs. Don't want to be subject to any more embarrassing overtaking moves by the over 60's.

As I walk to catch the bus I spot in the distance a grey dog lurching from house to house with a person attached to it. Ah, that must be L and Doggo on the papers. One downside of the cold is that it makes Doggo incredibly frisky and it looks like he's giving L a good workout this morning.

Lots of 'crap' in the papers today. The exercise issue is in the news again. They say that 80% of women are not doing enough exercise to be healthy. Despite the fact that women feel under incredible pressure to be thin, they say they hate the way they look when they exercise and say it 'conflicts with their image of femininity', so they don't do it. Which doesn't tally with the fact that most men think women look dead sexy when they exercise. Their loss. Men are from Mars, women are from Venus, as they say.

Mind you, someone who did get on his bike and do some exercise has been sentenced to three years on probation. A chap was caught in the 'act' with his bicycle by cleaners in his bedroom at the Aberley House Hostel in Ayr. They knocked on his door but there was no reply, so they let themselves in with the master key. They discovered the chap in a compromising position with his bike. Now he's been charged with sexually aggravated breach of the peace and been placed on the Sex Offenders Register. Perverse yes but surely what you get up to in your own room is your own business. Would he have ended up in court had he been doing it with a real person? It must have been a carbon frame.



Another royal cock-up by my good friends at the Royal Mail means my entry for Saturday's dog show hasn’t been delivered. So that's stuffed our weekend. We were planning to go to the show at Preston and then carry on up to the Lakes for the rest of the weekend. L's even been out and bought three bottles of mulled wine to ward off the cold, one red, one white and one AF. We're tempted to go anyway and just do the Lakes. Think we'll leave the AF one at home though.

When I get home, Daughter and L have gone off to the gym. I ought to run, so I take Doggo for a spin round the pond. It ends up more interesting than I intended. I put gloves on and when I attempt to scratch my eye, I miss. In the process I dislodge a contact lens which promptly disappears up my eye somewhere. Running round the pond in the dark by torch light with only one eye working is very disorientating. Eventually I manage to jiggle the lens back into the centre of my eye and thankfully full vision is restored.

At home L cooks up some very nice trout with mushroom ragout, which has sherry in it and she pours me a stonking glass of the sherry that is left over and a glass of red wine as well. So another fairly boozy night. Then we enjoy a double dose of Bleak House and post-watershed afters.

Secret Shopping

Lie in. Bit of romance. Coffee. Juice. Free Monday Paper. Bit more romance. Coffee. Juice.

I reluctantly break the cycle and go out for a training run with Doggo. Then wish I hadn't bothered. I get well pissed off with him when I have to run back a hundred metres, five times, to chivvy him along. Twice he’s got his nose in the grass perversely licking something, the other times his nose is up some other dog’s bottom. He growls at me and at the other dogs every time I pull him away. He ends up on the lead and eventually I end up dumping him back at home and doing an extra loop on my own. I vow not to take him on the park for a run again.

Drive into town to drop Daughter and her friend at the cinema, another shameless rehash of the Spiderman movie is on, part 33 I believe. Then I drop L at Asda. Then finally I park the car and Doggo in B&Q's car park and go in search of L’s birthday present. My incredibly unique girl wants a deckchair for her birthday. Reason being Doggo, with his ball tossing and towel shagging tendencies prevents any relaxing on our lawn. L reckons she will be safe on a deckchair. I am not so sure. Anyhow the only one that I can track down at short notice is at B&Q. Hawaiian Lime it’s called and so it is.



Hope she likes it.

I struggle to get hold of decent card though and not wishing to brave the hordes in town, I get something awful from Next. Hope she likes it. It's got a dog on but it's a poodle. Best not show it Doggo.

Secret birthday shopping done, I pop in to JJB to try and get some better running shoes for the event on Sunday. Despite my best efforts I still end up only paying £35 for a decent pair of Asics. JJB reckon that is half price. Internet says they may be half-right.

Head back to Asda to pick up L. Hope she doesn't spot the lime green deckchair hidden on the back seat.

In the evening we go to the cinema ourselves, to see Fast Food Nation which is a bit of a disappointment. Even if you discount the short role that Avril Lavigne has in it, she is as bad as you would expect but at least she didn't sing and hers isn't the only bad acting in it. The dark side (is there any other side?) of the fast food industry is an interesting idea for a film but here it's very badly done. As soon as you think they’re going to get their teeth into a particular topic they abandon it and move on to something else.

It tells a number of stories that are linked but then doesn’t seem to connect them together. Instead the film jumps around and nothing is explored enough to become interesting. The film fails to add anything to what I already know about fast food. Although I admit I probably know more than your average fast food eater does, so it's perhaps an education for some.



Overall, it's a wasted opportunity. It is no Super Size Me. Most of the stuff in the film, immigrant workers, artificial flavourings, bad working conditions, animals being killed for meat etc are all common knowledge. The only two shocking parts of it were the fact that faeces makes it into burgers and that workers lose limbs in the factories but in the end both disclosures were brushed under the carpet. Disappointing stuff.

Wentworth Brimstone 5.0% turns up again in the Broadway bar. I have a pint. Very nice but very naughty on a normally AF Monday. Oh well suppose it's a Bank Holiday.

L cooks up some excellent noodles, pesto, prawns, and veg.