Ram’s Testicles

Get up early to run the dog. L has injured her back and this is adding to her worry about Saturday. So I take Doggo for 'blast' round the pond. I'm sure it must be killing L to let me run without her, usually if I go out training without her she worries that I’ll be fitter than her. So I guess that shows that her back must be quite bad.

Doggo is a bit surprised that we are doing a 'blast', he seemed to prefer his runs quite leisurely. Well I'm sorry mate but I don't have time and we would have done quite a good time had he not stopped for a 'social' with some shaggy thing (a dog that is). Back at home I'm not sure who's in the worst state Doggo or me. It's a long time since I've done a 'blast'. Worrying thing is that the distance is less than what I have to run on Saturday but then I have to get on a bike rather than collapse in the bedroom.

As I drive into work, I remember why I gave up running in the mornings. This is because after an early morning run I struggle to stay awake in the car. Luckily I was awake when I encountered the burst water main flooding the road near the Wyvern.

L asks it I had the radio on this morning because something has happened on Ilkeston Road. Four houses were taped off and there were loads of police cars around. There were policemen, arm-in-arm, combing the pavements. I had the radio on but obviously on wrong channel, didn’t have Radio Nottingham on today. It turns out a man has been injured after a chemical was thrown at him when he answered his door.

L gets her back checked out with her boss. He tells her that she won't be fit enough to compete on Saturday. L tells him she will be. My girl's a bit obstinate you know. Apparently she shouldn't have trained while she had a virus. L's illogical diagnosis was that it was just her age but it's got nothing to do with that. He said he hoped it would get better because he would be embarrassed if he ended up treating her. Well I hope he’d give her preferential rates. We can’t afford his usual fees.

L sent me this article entitled View from the back

I smell a trap. Although it’s reassuring to see that there’s somebody who’s as bad a swimmer as I am. He too can only manage about 100m of front crawl before he has swallowed too much water to continue. Mind you I best get my skates on because if he improves by another 8 minutes this year at Derby, he’ll just beat my time from last year.

It's also nice to learn that "It’s very difficult to drown in a wetsuit", not that getting in one is anywhere near being on my agenda. Not for an outdoor swim anyway, I've never seen anyone use one indoors but it's worth a thought. I could always be the first.

L reckons she did 400 + minutes of exercise last week, that's not counting walking. Not bad for someone who claims to be unfit and injured.

Its Daughters parents evening tonight. She comes along with us, as we have to discuss her options for her GCSE subjects. She not happy about it though, she's distressed at the amount of TV we are making her miss, and I thought it was her future we were sorting out.

We arrive five minutes early for our first appointment but the Maths teacher gives the people before us 25 minutes (it's supposed to be 5 mins each) which makes us late for all out other appointments.

We spend ages trying to get to see the science teacher who always has someone with him and of course we're late for our slot. We keep popping back but he's always busy. The last time we pop back we see him running out of the door towards his car. More great customer service.

Another teacher who is running a display for a new subject also decides to throw the towel in early. Luckily not all the staff are so unhelpful, many stop past their allotted finish time to speak to us. Although I'm not actually sure we sort anything out as regards her options.

Get home and listen to the match. Derby ride their luck to come from behind and win 2-1 at Norwich. Which takes them back to the top of the league again.

Tonight's slaughter-fest is on lamb and it is pretty much the same as the one on beef, just on a smaller scale. The programme is clearly another of these identikit programmes. The first ten minutes are the same a yesterday's programme, the set and all the personnel involved are all exactly the same. The only thing that has changed are the animals and a different audience has been trawled in. The only addition was they served the audience stomach and testicles to munch on. Must nip down Sainsbury's and get some.

Tomorrow it's "sausages and bacon under the spotlight". Not that most sausages have been anywhere near a pig. L says Doggo might have munched on his last pork scratching.

Perhaps we could switch him to Ram’s testicles. They could even be the secret ingredient that I’ve been looking for to add a bit of zip to his agility. L is distressed at that suggestion because on the programme they seemed to come battered and fried. We have to think of Doggo's cholesterol. Mind you, they couldn’t possibly be unhealthier than pork scratchings. We already know how disgusting pork scratching are, they often still have bits of fur on them.